”It is truly a challenge for someone with anxiety to create opportunities for long term happiness.
Don’t let it stop you from trying.”
Hunger
When I let hunger sink in.
The melody of life stops playing.
And sometimes I can’t stand the sound of life.
So I starve myself in silence.
M.P.Yasmine
Universe
Sometimes the moon hits me on my face.
While clouds smother me.
Shooting stars scratch my itchy skin.
And being present on Earth kills me.
M.P.Yasmine
Dysfunctional families
”Generational trauma in dysfunctional families is a real thing.
And I hope there will be at least one person in each generation who breaks the cycle.”
M.P.Yasmine
Children
”The day I saw death creeping in on my father, I saw a lost child lying in bed yearning for his mom and dad.
Since that day I see children everywhere.
Lost children.”
M.P.Yasmine
Survival Mode
My body in agony.
My mind in ruins.
My senses spiraling out of control.
Frantically about everything.
I need a good sleep.
Deep sleep.
Reset.
I forgive you
I wish i could scream from the top of my lungs that I have forgiven them.
So even my dreams that haunt me at night could hear me.
Frightful whimpers wake me up each night.
The dead still much alive.
Haunting me, hurting me.
My hand covers my mouth.
I softly speak…
M.P.Yasmine
Walk along
When words mean nothing no more.
After life treated you the worst.
Leave them all behind without telling.
Don’t you dare shed one more tear.
In this river of misery those people are thirsty for.
M.P.Yasmine
Society
”Not only the pandemic withholds us from true authentic living.
The plague infested in our minds does too.”
M.P.Yasmine
Cigarette
”After 24 years smoking,
quitting brought me in this nonexistent deep void filled with sorrow and grief.
Each morning I decide if I have the strength to climb out of it.”
M.P.Yasmine
Growth
”Before, everything was in silence.
My pain and the cracks in my heart.
After, there was life and more than my own life.”
M.P.Yasmine
Mental Health
”Sometimes I recharge myself by unplugging the doorbell and sleep all day on a mattress between 2 couches.”
M.P.Yasmine
Mother
”Uploading writings about my mother feels like I’m polluting the Earth.”
M.P.Yasmine
Father
”I trusted the Grim Reaper so much,
I slept on a bed right next to Death.”
M.P.Yasmine
The zeitgeist we now live in is nothing more than the rotation of principals.
M.P.Yasmine
And sleep
Regulate slow breathing.
Eyes shut, fake sleeping.
Drinking and eating.
A little bit of feelings dealing.
Impossible dreaming.
6 am coffee and me.
M.P.Yasmine
Alive
Your mind in senses.
Swimming through inspiration.
Wow is all around you.
Move mountains with the tip of your fingers.
Breathe.
Alive you are.
M.P.Yasmine
Lovely new days
I don’t miss the old days.
Being trashed by the family I miserably grew up with.
Being smashed by people and substances to get numb with.
M.P.Yasmine
”When love hunts me, I’m running away in freeze response.”
M.P.Yasmine
Or a few more
There is not one soul of the opposite gender that comes to my mind while listening to love songs.
So I guess you can say I’m completely healed and my heart carefully stitched and close grown.
Nowhere my love belongs.
I think I need one more year alone.
M.P.Yasmine
Orphan Child
I always felt like an orphan child.
No mother, father or siblings supporting, comforting or loving me.
Still I was strong enough to comfort my parents to death.
The one and only thing they seem to be afraid of.
Ironic isn’t it?
M.P.Yasmine
Writing
Leaving a paper trail.
For that one person to read.
Hidden treasures in a box.
(N)ever to be found.
Stacked and colorful blended.
Carefully bound this bundle of snail mail.
One day others will read.
Our minds and feelings.
Our love for paper and ink.
Flowers and cards.
About life itself and how we are coping and dealing.
They will read about the true treasures of life.
M.P.Yasmine
Escape g.o.a.t
”The scapegoat choosing to go no-contact will be the happiest, healthiest and most successful of the family.
Generation on generation we see this happen.”
M.P.Yasmine
Peace and Freedom
My empath self wants to write a poem about you and mother.
Because four years ago you both decided to let life go.
Six months in between.
Not all dead can be beautifully written about.
Death itself sure.
Both of yours brought me peace and freedom.
M.P.Yasmine
Romance
Romance faded in the background.
Nearly black it is.
I wonder if there was ever.
Because I only desired to bound.